Indian Nominees for Nobel 2017
I'm very happy that Bob Dylan won the Nobel for Literature this year. My only sadness was that it didn't go to some Indian lyricist like Sameer. Since it should not happen next year, as a proud Indian, I nominate the following Indians under various categories for 2017:
1. Literature: Deepak Balraj Vij and Rahi Masoom Raza for having created new poetic expressions within the great Hindi film tradition through a character we know as "Basco, Murderer of disco dancers from London", and coming up with this plotline:
"With his legs broken by Oberoi's goons and guitar phobia from the incident with his mother, Jimmy must claim first place for Team India at the International Disco Dancing Competition amidst strong competition from Team Africa and Team Paris."
2. Medicine: Apollo Hospital, Greams Road, Chennai, for inventing the most advanced, comprehensive and complicated treatment ever for "fever" and "dehydration".
3. Peace: Subramanian Swamy, for opposing war, keeping a vigil on the ISIS, Dravida Kazhagam and the LTTE, and for showing hope to the world that "Long stable peace always follows a just decisive war".
4. Economics: Mukesh Ambani, for controlling a nation's economy without holding public office.
5. Physics: Md. Moyeed Abrar for his seminal paper, "Power cut off and Power Blackout in India a Major threat- An Overview", published in a peer-reviewed journal (and not as an 8th standard science project) that contains cutting-edge solutions such as "Innovative Transmission Technologies" (without mentioning what such innovations are), "Properly educating and giving technically sound training to operators in power plants" and "More renewable energy sources in future". He must get further points for the photographs of power cuts so seamlessly embedded in his paper.
6. Chemistry: To the website, servecows.org, for finding out the exact divine chemical composition of cow urine.
1. Literature: Deepak Balraj Vij and Rahi Masoom Raza for having created new poetic expressions within the great Hindi film tradition through a character we know as "Basco, Murderer of disco dancers from London", and coming up with this plotline:
"With his legs broken by Oberoi's goons and guitar phobia from the incident with his mother, Jimmy must claim first place for Team India at the International Disco Dancing Competition amidst strong competition from Team Africa and Team Paris."
2. Medicine: Apollo Hospital, Greams Road, Chennai, for inventing the most advanced, comprehensive and complicated treatment ever for "fever" and "dehydration".
3. Peace: Subramanian Swamy, for opposing war, keeping a vigil on the ISIS, Dravida Kazhagam and the LTTE, and for showing hope to the world that "Long stable peace always follows a just decisive war".
4. Economics: Mukesh Ambani, for controlling a nation's economy without holding public office.
5. Physics: Md. Moyeed Abrar for his seminal paper, "Power cut off and Power Blackout in India a Major threat- An Overview", published in a peer-reviewed journal (and not as an 8th standard science project) that contains cutting-edge solutions such as "Innovative Transmission Technologies" (without mentioning what such innovations are), "Properly educating and giving technically sound training to operators in power plants" and "More renewable energy sources in future". He must get further points for the photographs of power cuts so seamlessly embedded in his paper.
6. Chemistry: To the website, servecows.org, for finding out the exact divine chemical composition of cow urine.
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